Sunday, November 11, 2012

Seeking That Rush

I am not an adrenalin junkie by any stretch of the imagination. I don't bungee jump or sky dive or even have the desire to do so. Although part of me admires those who do live their life on the edge I have no desire to go there with them. Last night I had an unexpected adrenalin rush. As I was driving at approximately 100 km per hr down the highway, on my way to Yarmouth, a huge deer darted in front of the van. There was no time to stop and a lane of on coming cars was beside me. There was no where to go. I was going to hit the deer. The deer seemingly had no escape: it was either going to be hit by me or the cars in the other lane. But by the grace and protection of God the deer passed in front of my vehicle and across to the other side safely. I don't know how that happened except that God was there on the road with us and protected us and the deer.

After that happened my palms were sweaty, my heart was racing, the occupants of the van were all nervously laughing. We had an adrenalin rush. Its a feeling I could probably live the rest of my life without feeling again and be quite happy. But there is that wonderful, exhilarating feeling you can have when you're doing a planned activity which causes an adrenalin rush and that is a great thing and something quite separate from the scared, unexpected rush we experience when we are faced with a situation like last night. Whether it be from a roller coaster ride or riding on a motorcycle down an open highway or jumping in the waves at the ocean and fighting against the tide's pull, all of these things can bring an excitement.

But I seek a rush of a different type. I like living life on the edge too just differently than hanging on to the side of a mountain by my toenails or tightrope walking. I chose to live my life on the edge when I completely and fully surrendered my life to God. Oh, I had been a Christian for a long time but had never completely surrendered my will to His. I was content to be a church attender and be a willing worker for the Lord. I was happy that I had the assurance that I was going to spend eternity in Heaven. I was safe. I was content. I was happy.

My life was like ice cream. We all love ice cream. It's yummy and creamy and good. But I was vanilla. (I never could understand how someone could say vanilla ice cream was their favourite flavour of ice cream. But that's a story for another day.) I need the excitement of Rocky Road or Heavenly Hash. I need to find the unexpected treasure hidden in that bowl of goodness.

For all of those years of being a 'good, predictable' Christian, I longed to have 'life and life more abundantly' as the Word promised I would have when I came to Christ. But you see, I hadn't completely come to Christ. I was still holding back a part of me. I was holding back my will. I liked doing things my own way. But my own way often lead me to trouble and it certainly left me in 'vanilla land'.

Once I came to the realization that I had to die to self and say 'whatever You want Lord, wherever You want me to go, whatever You want me to do, I will do it'. Once I said that and surrendered my will to His, life became an adventure. It wasn't humdrum anymore. It was unexpected, exhilarating, wonderful. It truly was life and life more abundant! I never know what He is going to ask me to do or where He will ask me to go but I know that no matter what He is with me and I don't need to be afraid. I love waking up in the morning and saying 'ok Lord what do You have planned for today?'

Let me encourage you to let it all go and seek that rush you can have when you are totally surrendered to Him. You can't parachute unless you jump out of the plane. You can't have life more abundantly if you are still hanging on to your way of doing things and your old life. Let go and feel the rush!

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